Jokes

PraetorXII wrote: @ FURK - Hahaha mate where do you get this stuff?? Hilarious do you make them yourself? +1

Most of them. I can't really post it on my social media so this is the best place to share it.

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my lady saw me laughing at the vince meme and asked me to show her... she didn't get it LOL

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Love it when they take the piss out the fake natties.

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Oh shit, just realized there are a couple of crossfitters here. No harm meant, you know how bodybuilders are always talking smack about crossfit community. :kiss:

Im sure this is a typo

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Hierdie naweek is 'n besonderse mylpaal in my lewe......
Dit is die 30ste comrades in 'n ry wat ek nie sal hardloop nie. 'n Spesiale woord van dank aan my hoofborge, Simba, Nestle, Pannaroti's, Milky Lane en Coco Cola, sowel as 'n paar kleiner borge. Ook dankie aan al die ander eetplekke wat dit vir my moontlik gemaak het. (Vir polities korrekte redes mag ek nie Spur ook noem nie...)

Edward the Longshanks het met meer as 4 000 troepe Suid Afrika toe gekom om die Boere op te fok . .


By die Slagveld gekom sien hy doer in die verte op n koppie staan, n figuur met blonde hare, kortbroek aan met n kam in sy kous.


"Rooinek!" skree die Boer op die koppie. "Kom hier jou Engelse moer! I will gives you one helluva gatskop!"


Edward draai om na sy bevelvoerder en sê: "Take 20 men and deal with that Boer upstart!"


Die bevelvoerder stuur 20 man om die Boer te gaan soek.


Tien minute later staan die Boer weer op die koppie. "You English donner!


Stuur the rest of your Rooinekke. I will fok them almal op!"


Edward raak nou ietwat ge-irriteerd en sê vir die bevelvoerder: "Take 100 men and kill that little guttersnipe!"


Die bevelvoerder stuur 100 man oor die koppie.


'n Rukkie later staan die Boer so waar as wragtig weer op die randjie en skree: "Hey, you, Jou ma se moer! I is just warming up! Come moer me dik, as jy kan !"


Toe verloor Edward kop en stuur 400 troepe om die Boer dood te maak.


Tien minute later staan die Boer weer daar. Sy klere is geskeur en sy hare staan wild. Dis net snot, bloed en Klipdrift. Weer skree hy: "Is dat de best you can do? You bloody pommies! Come on, souties! Kom klap me stukkend!"


Rooi in die gesig sê Edward vir die bevelvoerder: "Take the rest of the men and don't come back until you have killed him!"


Vyf minute later kom een van die troepe al gillende en vol bloed oor die randjie gestorm: "Sir, Sir! skree hy, It's a trap! There are two of them!"

Lets have some English humour too pls :lol:

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Tydens 'n mediese ondersoek sê die dokter vir die vrou "Jou hart, longe, pols en bloeddruk is alles goed...

Laat my net gou loer na daai ding wat julle dames in allerhande moeilikheid kry." ...
Die dame begin haar onderklere uittrek, maar word deur die dokter onderbreek.
... "Nee! Nee! Moenie jou klere verwyder nie ... steek net jou tong uit!"

PraetorXII wrote: Tydens 'n mediese ondersoek sê die dokter vir die vrou "Jou hart, longe, pols en bloeddruk is alles goed...

Laat my net gou loer na daai ding wat julle dames in allerhande moeilikheid kry." ...
Die dame begin haar onderklere uittrek, maar word deur die dokter onderbreek.
... "Nee! Nee! Moenie jou klere verwyder nie ... steek net jou tong uit!"

WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA +1

Good jokes, thx all. That Crossfit joke Furk, cough cough uhummmm... kak snaaks

+1 all

Pyroclasm wrote:

I think I am on season 7....lol

I'm on one of those last episodes where the main characters are now married and the punchlines are so stale even the audience struggles to laugh on cue. How do you switch series?

Pyroclasm wrote: I'm on one of those last episodes where the main characters are now married and the punchlines are so stale even the audience struggles to laugh on cue. How do you switch series?

Hmmmm, supernatural is on season 12....Simpsons like 30? We need to get on those shows...

I'll go on the Simpsons as long as I can be a spider pig and doing whatever a spider pig does.

Lol, Homer and his spider pig on the ceiling.
Cartoons we can kinda relate to.
Uncle grandpa and all this modern shit, tigers that fart rainbows and fly. Need to smoke weed to laugh at that shit.

Getting old

FIllet wrote: Getting old

lol, yeah...I feel it...aches n pains....ailments. And used to get annoyed with the old folks complaining of same when I was a kid...